The Pressure Cooker named July

I barely know how to balance my daily life usually. This month is going to be insane! I have 3 weeks and 1 day until we move. I haven't started packing yet, I haven't heard if we got the house yet in Spring. I had to jump through hoops to try to get the house. I am teaching the lesson in Relief Society on Sunday, babysitting extra babies next week, packing Brae and Ken up for girls camp next week, planning Bella's baptism in two weeks from Saturday and dealing with intense emotional pressure. All of that plus babysitting my normal kids and doing vinyl everyday and taking care of my family. I feel like I am going to crack. I really just want it all to be over. Is that sad?

I loved this!

I saw this picture in Mardel a couple weeks back and I loved what it said. It was a picture of Jesus by himself in a field and it said this:

"Jesus learned obedience in the wilderness."

It reminded me that he learned to do the will of his Father when he was all alone. Makes me put my life into perspective because I've been "alone" this summer and have been learning why I want to be obedient. Just for myself. By myself.

Purpose

My little buddy, Mees, has been coming over early in the mornings this summer. We always take a run through the McDonalds drive thru to get my liquid addiction (really that's another post for another day) and this morning we also ran to the bank. On my way to the bank I was thinking about my trial and how I can already feel a small portion of it's possible purpose. I had a feeling come over me earlier this week of pure joy, of exalting hope of happiness and the possibility of finding love again. I haven't found it yet but I had a moment where I felt what it would be like and knew of a hope for my future. I liked the feeling. I was thinking this morning that we go through hardships that we may know the joy and the joy feels better. There's a quote on that principle and I WILL find it!!! So, I believe that for me passing through hard times will be beneficial in finding my lasting joy later. 


Also, I have truly felt the power of empathy lately. I know I posted about my massage therapist and how she understood what I was going through. I am so appreciative of my family and friends who sympathize with me, they carry me through my trials. And I'm very thankful for women who can empathize because they often bridge the gaps from where I would like to be and getting there. I have a good friend now who is also going through a break up. I don't know if my empathy will help her but there are chances I will have in the future to help others as I've been helped. 


I know my understanding is limited and minute but I'm grateful for the insights I've had and a feeling of purpose in my trials. As I was sitting at the bank I read this on my friend's "The Facebook" (just for you!) and it was the perfect quote for today's revelations: 


"Everybody in this life has their challenges and difficulties. That is part of our mortal test. The reason for some of these trials cannot be readily understood except on the basis of faith and hope because there is often a larger purpose which we do not always understand. Peace comes through hope."
--James E Faust

Expectations...

I just realized today that my expectations and my reality are on two different pages. I woke up this morning and seriously thought I'd finish four boards (two of which are really difficult) and a vinyl wall decal AND watch two babies and finish another order for a customer and go swimming with my friends AND water the foundation AND have it all done in time to go to the post office by 5. AND I'm sick and feeling drained.

Why in the crap do I ever think I can do so much?! ha Perhaps it's time to re-evaluate some things... yeah.

{C}

Pretty much my most favorite picture of him yet! 

LoVE!!! 

He's Arrived

Bentley

13 months

Terrible Two's.

Need I say more?? 

I Got Lucky

When we drove down to Galveston Beach in May I got pulled over by a police officer and was given a warning (thank goodness) to put a front license plate on my car. I looked and looked and couldn't find that plate so I had to make a trip to the Tax Collector's office. I was told by a friend to take my proof of insurance and registration and go in. So I headed over without much preparation. I took Bentley without shoes and without snacks and as I got to the office I found I didn't even have a current insurance card (why not?!? I have no idea) and my registration sheet is my old one BUT I felt lucky and went in with what I had.... to find the line a mile long. Literally. We waited for an hour and I knew there was a chance I wouldn't even have what was needed and may have to come back a different day. It didn't take long before Bentley wanted down! Without shoes. On the hard and dirty floor. I became "that mom" with "that baby" as he started throwing his tantrums when I would try to pick him up OR move him. The video is just a little shot of him showing off and doing his OWN thing. He is a persistent little bugger. After an hour in line (and after we pulled off a little throw up as drool and much screaming from baby) we got new plates! And for cheap. All the worker needed to see was my vin # and license and he pulled up my info (which is what I was hoping for!) I felt SO lucky and happy after that. I knew I could have taken my luck to Vegas at that point. But I don't have any money and I don't gamble. haha