I have had a little note sitting on my desk for months reminding me to write this post. A lot of miracles and heavenly help has been given over the past few months and I just want to jot a few of them down. A lot of my problems come from lack of mental capacity when faced with responsibilities. I am often emotionally and mentally weighed down. I remember one weekend where I worked on 3 major papers. I finished a big one Friday and was left with two due before Saturday at bedtime. By Saturday night I was so "done" with writing I could not even think straight. I ran to pick up one of the girls at 10pm and said a prayer, through tears, on my drive asking for help. When I got home I was able to start the flow of thinking and finished out a decent paper. I know I received help beyond what I was mentally and emotionally capable of that night.
Another time I received practical help was when I was asked out on a date a couple months ago. I said yes way in advance, and then in typical Amanda fashion, as the date got closer I really wanted to back out. I have a big thing with wasting time I don't have. I would rather be with my kids or sleep or do something responsible than go on a date with someone I know there's no future with. The week leading up to the date I was really wanting to cancel but it wasn't the right thing to do. I woke up the morning of the date with a new attitude of excitement. I know that helpful attitude was not of me because I wanted to stay home lol. I was very grateful for the Lord's help because that made the day and date enjoyable.
Kensington was the softball manager for her school team this year and it's tradition that all the Varsity players and managers take turns hosting pasta night at their houses. I was really hoping Kensington's house would get skipped. I don't host, I don't cook well, and most everyday I struggle just to feed my own kids, let alone an entire team of kids. Kensington did not get skipped and when it came time to have the dinner I was filled with peace. The peace I felt made everything ok. The entire event was smooth and calm. I was SO grateful for that help!
I don't think I ever blogged about the miracle of Braelyn's car. Last summer Josh offered their old car to Shannon's family and in turn Shannon offered it to Braelyn to use. It was free, except for tags and registration, and has been such a blessing to our family! It's a Chrysler PT Cruiser, red with brown paneling on the side. It's not the most handsome car but it RUNS!! And she loves it. How many families do you know receive a free car for their teenager to drive around?
The past month has been so stressful and intense financially and schedule-wise. I ran out of my school loans the end of March and was scared. Every time I would start to get nervous I would feel this "peace wall" right there, which let me know the Lord was aware and had a plan. My vinyl cutting machine had been acting up for months and I was too overwhelm and broke to look into fixing it... until one day it really broke bad. I called the company who manufactures it and they suggested replacing one part of the machine to see if it would work. The dilemma was that if I spent the money on that one part I would not have any money left to send the machine in IF the part didn't make it work! This was the time I was praying for 3 specific miracles from the Lord:
1- the piece I ordered would fix the vinyl cutter machine
2- (not glamorous) much needed help with food money
3- a babysitting job to provide for my family
It was amazing and not surprising at the same time to watch the Lord answer my prayers and grant my miracles. Every one of them. The piece did fix the vinyl machine. The state granted a decent amount of money each month for food (more the first month than ever before, then a decent amount each month after for six months... I hate that part of my life and desire to provide on my own but am grateful for the help), and a door was opened to a wonderful babysitting opportunity to earn money to pay the bills and extras in May.
Recently I was trying to trade Kensington's phone in for an upgrade for her birthday. This would help me in two ways. She gets a nice gift and no out of pocket expense to me. I did say "no out of pocket expense to me", right! That was the key! Initially, the month before her birthday, the lady at Verizon told me it was do-able. Then, last week I called in to order and the lady told me her phone wasn't eligible. After staying on the phone for a long time she verified it was NOT possible at this time. I then knew I would have to come up with money for her gift... money which I did not have. The money I made last week babysitting was not going to be enough for everything I needed. I went to the temple and as I left I called Verizon back to make sure one last time that it wasn't a possibility. The lady talked it over with her manager and called me back letting me know they COULD do it. It was an "open door" in my eyes; helping me better provide for all our other needs.
Some people may look at our miracles and the Lord's hand in my life as coincidences or think I am looking too hard but I know in whom I trust and share that there is no way that I could be doing all this on my own. 5 kids, by myself, less child support than I'm supposed to receive, unstable child support at that, full time college student, preparing a full time college student to leave this summer, owner of vinyl company, babysitter, training for part time Swim Instructor Admin. job... church, home life, schedules... yeah, no way! < 3
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